As soon as the excitement calms down surrounding your engagement, you are normally faced with a ‘What the f#$k do we do now?’ feeling, which by the way is totally normal! You will get inundated with questions from everyone right from the get go, wanting to know if you’ve set a date, found a dress/suit, having a band, the list goes on and it likely won’t end until the day you tie the knot.
Most engaged couples haven’t planned a wedding before, and even if you have, you might want to do things differently this time. Here’s some things to tick off or to get you started on the right foot.
Tell your nearest and dearest, then work outwards from there
I’m sure you have probably already done this but just in case, it is best to start letting those closest to you know before posting on social media. You want to be the one to tell your parents, siblings, grandparents and besties instead of Facebook. So get on that phone and do the dialling or in this day, send the snap to your fav people. You can do this straight after the fact or bask in your private engaged bliss for a few days. Remember that once everyone knows the news there might be expectations floating around about attending your special day, don’t commit too early to people you aren’t sure will make your final guest list, it will save any awkward conversations later on!
Have an engagement party
Totally up to you if you decide to have one, some couples do some don’t. This doesn’t have to be a big party with a venue hired and a caterer doing canapes (although awesome if it is and that’s what you want to do!) it can be pizza and drinks at your house, a dinner out at a restaurant or a few drinks down at the pub. There are no rules when it comes to weddings so you might as well learn that as early as you can in the planning process.
Start thinking about how you want your day to look and feel like
This will help shape all of your planning and how you put your day together. Do you want a large ballroom wedding with neutrals and greenery, or maybe a marquee outdoor reception with all the latest trends? Which area do you want it to be in? Your hometown, favourite family spot or even somewhere completely new overseas? Get an image in your mind, draw a picture, jot down notes, create a moodboard of your wants and from here you will start to see your wedding take shape. Use it as a guide to search the right vendors and get a cohesive feel throughout your day.
Begin to look into your realistic budget
As much as you can plan and Pinterest away, at the end of the day it always comes back to costings and how it will fit into your overall budget. You can start to research vendors in the area you want to get married, construct an estimate budget that you can work from when booking vendors and from here work out how long you might need to save for before the wedding. This can be helpful when it comes to setting a wedding date, you might want a short engagement but realistically if you can’t afford to pay for the wedding you want in only 5 months, you will either need to change the wedding you had in mind or choose a date further out to allow for you to save the extra cash.
If you have family members that want to contribute to the wedding costs, this is the ideal time to sit them down and have a constructive conversation. Make sure everyone is on the same page as to what their budget might be, how much they want to contribute and if there are any strings attached. They might want to add a couple of their friends to the guest list or have their money pay for a specific aspect of the wedding. If you aren’t good at budgets I would highly recommend getting help from a family member, friend or wedding planner. With a planner, it will cost for their services but seriously they can save you thousands in the long run making sure you don’t overspend on things that aren’t important to you and won’t be biased or try to convince you into something you might not want.
Set your date!
Woohoo! This is the coolest thing to do. It sets everything in stone and from here you can start locking in vendors, creating save the dates and invites and most importantly, when people ask if you have a date set (which they will because we are all nosey parkers that love weddings), you finally can say yes! There are many things that can contribute to helping you choose the right date, if you have your heart set on a particular venue or vendor it is best to check with them any potential dates they have available and choose your date from there. You might want to choose it spontaneously out of a hat or throwing a dart at a year calendar. You might want to be romantic and have a date that already means something to you, or be like Mr Ash and go with one that is easily remembered. Either way you will be able to find the perfect day, and remember, there are no rules! It doesn’t have to be a Saturday, it doesn’t have to be in summer, it can be whenever the heck you want it to be!
Don’t forget to be excited!
You’re engaged! In the near future you will be married to your best friend! Enjoy that feeling and don’t let it go, because at the end of the day, that’s all that matters.
If you need any help with where to get started don't be afraid to reach out! You will have the perfect day, exactly how you want it.
Mrs Ash xx